Wednesday, April 15, 2026

The Sunshine Shoals Gazette

"All the News That's Fit to Regret"

Everglades Artifact Smuggler Ratboy Rick Nets $4,080

The Ramirez sisters discovered that operating a fake "wellness retreat" in an abandoned beachfront motel could generate significant cash from wellness-obsessed tourists. By offering "detox" packages, charging $4,080 upfront, and providing nothing more than herbal tea and vague spiritual platitudes, they turned a tidy profit without breaking a sweat.